Borrowed some DVDs and the Book Cross . Waited for Brother and his friend and we went home . Mum left .... 

Went down to hawker center and had some vegetables rice with some pork soup .... Walked around a little . Brother got his new pillow and I got some PANDA eye masks $10 . 

We drove to Jurong Point . I left to get my Kitty tumble from Young Heats - 2 sets !!! Deposited $500 into Maybank and deposit $100 into OCBC . 

Brother went to top up his cash card and I met him at the NTUC . $47.82 .

We shopped .... then drove to the Jurong East prata place .

We ordered a cup of milk tea and Brother left for a run . Waited for him .... and we had pratas . 

I drove home .... failed parking .

Failed .

Brother made me bath twice today !!! 

When back .... 

It wasn't long before I went down for lunch - Vegetables rice . I shopped at the supermarket as well . Just made a round .... I saw Uncle and Ah Ma while on my way back . So , I went back first . They came back and we left .

Went to Uncle's condo . Brought Ah Ma up to the house cause she wanted to pass urine . So we left to take the train ... to Ang Mo Kio .

We had toast box for tea . Uncle got for me milk tea ... and toast . Yummy . We shopped for a while and went back to Uncle's condo .

We drove ... Uncle went to get dinner .

We got home and the maid was around already . Since then , I don't need to do anything much . I had my dinner and was allowed to leave early .

So , I went back to the unit and clear my locker , once again . My phone died .... I borrowed the phone from the screening counter . Called Brother . Met him at our usual place and Brother drove me home .

Reached home .... So , called Ken ... my phone was charging and it cannot make call . It just auto shut down again . He was free .... strange . I though we decided to meet after he countdown with his girlfriend ....

I went down to meet him .

WOW !!!

HIS NEW BIKE !!!

So , we rode .... he rode ...

We went to Trade hub 21 and had McDonald's .

Some Large Ice Lemon Tea , Large Fries and Nuggets . $9.40 .

We sat at the car park and talk .

He sent me home ...

And before we know it . It was 12 midnight !

Happy Birthday Ken !

So , it was the end .

First time I was given the same assignment .... He was nice , really very nice . Can see the way he treat her .

Sometimes , I felt so awkward . Like intruding .

And oh .... lifts and ramps are for wheelchair / prams ... not for ables bodied .

Messaged Ms Alice . GSK .

Yeah . Got my staffs and we walked .

Went to Suntec . Gosh . The last time I walked through the City Link in a rush .... now .... slowly ...

Waited and waited .

7pm to 8.30pm !!!!

I finally redeemed my things and took 502 home . The bus ride was not nice at all !!!

There were no seats ... 

So . I reached home .

Skyped .

Did not managed to talk much with him yesterday , about yesterday .

He was in total darkness !! And I was so tired ....

Today , he got to go off early . But at least I managed to talk to him , I felt ...

Slightly better . Can't believe what I replied her yesterday .

Was too emotional . But she was REALLY REALLY very nice ... 

Why ?!

We missed each other at 11 /12 . Was at 64 when she's at 63 .

But thankfully ... we met .

I did not reply her ... and she messaged again .

Anyway , I felt better talking . 

Thank you .

So , we had Ayam Nasi Penyket yesterday in the middle of the night .

Fat fat ! I could hardly finish it !

So , I got this feeling to ride . I tried to leave as soon as possible . The road was still ... okay ... No jam , but not as nice either . I managed to reach home safety , in one piece .

Slacked a while . I was dozing off right in front of my cupboard , trying to get some home clothes to bathe .

So I slept . Was totally knocked out . Seriously , how did I managed to survive 5 nights ?!

Woke up at 4pm plus , had the Pau Mummy prepared .

I asked Mum to make take away dinner as well .

So , I saw fishes , Salmon . I asked , she said that Brother is coming home for dinner . Really ? Only him ?

Then she scolded me , again .

Whatever .

So , I just trained to work ....

Had my dinner .... Almost vomited . Totally no appetite .

Half way through at 9pm , time point . I asked the subject to go shower . I changed the bed sheet , the water flash and the basin of water for fever . So I was just standing there , waiting for him to come out of his shower , so that I can clear all his dirty clothes ...

I looked out of the window . It was about 9.20pm .... In less than an hour time , 10pm ... the afternoon staffs would go home . The road would be smooth . I miss those days ....

Ride at 6am for morning shift , 10pm for night shift ...

No peak hour , no jam ...

Where Brother would come and fetch me .

How different it is now .

I talked with Mia ... it's going to be New Year .... So what had you done ?

This year , everything is not right at all .

Work , Him , home .

I hate everything !

But , I just got to hold on , correct ?

Sometimes , I just feel so tired and worn out . Just want to run away from everything . Wish that everything is peaceful once again .

But I guess it's impossible .

Next year , next month , everything would be alright ....

I hope .

Zzz .

Was so tired and knocked out . They should get much better office chairs . So we dosed at 3am , did the 5am temperature .

Just sat there and talked ....

Oh , we were talking about boyfriend during dinner . She asked me , so I answered , how I met him . Then she shared with me .

We were talking about the lighting , then the topic became our ward practices . How different it is , how she came here ....

Had instant noodles , again . Was too hungry . Some curry chicken favour .

Those were the days . We had naps ....

6.45am , woke up . Anna reached .

7am , I went to take the last temperature . Waited for Mia to finish passing over to Shirley and Anna and we left .

Walked to the train station ....

Slow transport home . The road seems clear and nice , maybe it was still early , 7.15am ??

Was totally very tired . Had the cake and expired chocolate milk and knocked out till 1pm plus , 2pm .

Mum came home and cooked for me .

Brother drop me off .

 

Work . Sent subject down for Biopsy . Had lunch with Yu Yong at the Indian stall .

 

Take away for Kan as well . Plus Highlander coffee .

 

So , shift ended . Rushed down to centre . Brought some sahami for Brother . $4.20 .

 

He's instructor said he can proceed with the next stage .

 

Yeah !

 

Top up $100 for Brother .

I woke up . Parents are at home . Some distance relatives last day funeral today . Dad stayed overnight yesterday . They are going to send the last journey later .

So , 11am . Mum was preparing my lunch and I was about to get ready , was still lazing around ....

Kan messaged me . Screening patient !

So I had my lunch , parents left and I continued my sleep . So tired . 3pm or 4pm .

I packed my dinner of cakes and biscuits . Went to Jurong Point and got the rest of the popping Rilakkuma stickers !

$6.90 each and I got 6 of them ! Discounted to $37.20 . There goes the $40 I got on Monday ....

Since it was still early , I decided to go to Suntec . Rushed down to the Groupon . It was so crowded ! I waited till 6.15pm .... I left .

3.34pm message from Kan . So late ..... Anyway , it was raining , I managed to reach on the dot .

With Mia . Yeah .

7pm time point was done , next is 9pm . We had our dinner ....

Read my library book , slacked .....

The alarm rang at 6.30am . Got ready for work .... Brother was leaving as well , but I left first . Since he was still wearing his socks .

Slow poke !

So , I headed to Pioneer an took to SGH . Was the first ...

Was just doing my hair and changing my shoes when Kan and Alice came . Kan told me that I wrote the date at the attendance as 08/12/2012 . Opps .

So I printed out the E trolley checklist , since it's a new week . Kan checked one while I checked the another trolley .

Bernard appeared . Alvin came !

Adrian called up . And I thought it was Ken ! Luckily Bernard was around and he helped me answered the call .

Bernard and I opened out the E trolley and replenished everything . I updated the Excel file .

Jo actually wanted to go for lunch first . But Kan asked and I agreed to go . I went to Station 2 to get my money when I saw Bernard and he came with us .

So we walked passed my old Ward 11  / 12 .............. The new building was almost complete .... How long had it been ? Those memories ... the garden .....

We were waiting to cross the road when Kan finally spoke . He knew all about it and wanted me to open my mouth .

We all had the same food and drink . Noodles and my favorite ice milk tea .

So it turned out that Bernard was extra . I really don't know !!! But it was nice having lunch . I smiled , I laughed .

I asked stupid questions . Bernard was the one asking about the pay . Hm ....

The guys wanted me to talk , yeah , including Bernard .

It was then I realized , when I spoke ...

True . This may be a different environment from the wards . But at least we work together as a team , die together as one in MICU . No matter how much you dislike the person , you still help her . Take over from her , help her check and top up the medications . I even remembered when the seniors who trusted me rather than the another trained senior staff ...

Oh yeah . We miss Shar so much ! Heard that she's not feeling well , again ....

So , we walked back . Kan went to get chocolates from 7-11 . Bernard went to get soy drink .

I was left with Kan and he guessed . Yeah , only 2 . Clever .

Went back . Kan was doing assessment with Mia , Jo and Anna . I joined in on and off . Talked to Bernard .

What's the point ? He can't take sides as well . And it would be difficult for him . Maybe a listening ear ... But well ... it would be very hard for him . I'm just complicating things .....

Then I left at around 2.30pm to MICU . Saw Saw and Ber . Passed the expiring stuffs to Saw and he exchanged the 7.0 ETT for me .

I went back , then left with Shirley to NICU . Exchanged the 1mls syringes with them .

We went back and had Code Blue Practice .

I only remembered the first team has Mia , Alvin , Bernard and Anna ....

I was the second team with Alvin and Shirley .

It ended and I managed to scheduled my appointment . They can slot me in at 6pm . So I stayed for the fire drill talk .

It ended and I left . Was asking Kan about the on call rates .... So confusing !

Was walking and managed to catch up with Bernard . He missed his train . I left .

Orchard . I.E.C .

$40 .

Took 502 home .

Sat peacefully , Face book on Ipad , switched on my hand phone radio .

Jam , as usual .

I was sound asleep when Mum called and woke me up .

She's going to some distance relative funeral . Got to have dinner myself . I was hungry . In order to save money , since I got very very very limited amount now , I decided to go home and cook .

Instant noodles , uncooked chicken nuggets and tofu . Potato balls and hot dog . Made myself a cup of Apple Tea as well , since I had Milk Tea for lunch today , already .

Watch the " Winnie The Pooh " DVD which I borrowed yesterday .

Nice .

So I was just online ..... Skyped . Mum and Brother came home . They got some cheese thingy . But I don't feel like eating .

I saw Skypeing with Him when Mum came in and talked to him as well .

Gave Brother my left over of Apple Tea .

Ken called . I complained to him about his Brother ! I thought it was him ! Seriously ! So we chatted ....

He got a new bike !

Cool .

Was Whatapp - ing with Abby , Percie . Hui Chueng and Christy never reply .

Complained to them about His parents .... How I got to work really hard .

But my colleagues won't know , won't understand . Would they ?

Amanda called and woke me up . She just ended her night . 4 nights . Chatted with her . But not much , can't really hear her over the phone . Need a catch up STAT !

Continued sleeping till 10.30am when Brother woke me up . Prepared and went out with Dad and Brother . Brother drove to Clementi Vibe . Had the Japanese Plus Big deal meal .

Dad left , Brother drop me off that Jurong East . Crossed the overhead bridge to the Library . Got the Book Cross books and went to the interchange , took 334 home .

Face book a while till Mum woke up . She wanted to go Jurong Point since her colleague is having a store at the Library .

Took the bus .... saw some flea market on the way . We alighted and walked ... nothing much .

Board another bus and went Jurong Point . Walked to the DBS Bank ... it was crowded . So we went to the Library .

Saw these anti dust caps !!! 2 for $5 ... Got it !

It was pouring !!!

We stayed inside the Library reading .... Mum wanted to leave , but it was still pouring . So we went back again ....

Till I wanted to leave . Then I saw some CDs which I like ... browsed through them and borrowed them .

Went to Jurong Point . Mum want to redeem her Prima Deli voucher . We were walking when I saw this cute fat stickers !!!

$6.90 !!!

I got it .

So we went to use the voucher and took bus home . I went home first while Mum went to get some other stuffs .

Dinner was great .

Brother's yesterday Ee Mian and 3 chicken wings !!

Yummy .

I woke up quite early in the morning , about 7am plus and messaged Kan . He replied . He was up early as well ...

Night on call .

So Face book till I was tired and went back to sleep , all the way till 1.30pm . Woke up and ate my breakfast / lunch .

Mum came home .... I continued using the laptop .

Connected onto my old Nokia phone and tried to copy all the messages ... So many !!!

Fell asleep on Brother's bed until he came home . Went inside Mum's room to pack my clothes . So many !!!

It was almost 7pm when Brother woke up from his nap and I got ready .

We left and Brother drove to the Yoke Hotel . Had Cousin's wedding dinner ...

Home .

Received a shocking message from Janani !!!

Message Min Hui who replied , but Amanda was not around ....

He slept early . He did called a few times ...

Good night . 

Shirley called me and woke me up . I'm supposed to turn up for work at 1pm . 

So I'm supposed to start work at 7am .

I bumped into Er when I got out of the train !!!

Just chatted ....

I was early . I knew that I was working with Kan .

Checked both E trolley .

Finished my breakfast while just waiting for time .

It was early . Me , Kan , Tutie and Kyreen were at the counter talking .

Bernard came . We did CTC together . Stayed inside Room 4 and talked ....

I sent the blood ... the usual guy was not around .

Second round . Alvin went with me . Then he waited outside for me . I settled my stuffs , said bye to Bernard and went down Kopitiam for lunch with Alvin .

Had my favorite Laksa . Had sudden craving for it . $2.96 .

So , went back ... there was a Code Blue Practice where I was the third responder . First was Jo , then Anna .

They had meeting next . I was being left with Alvin .

So , at 3.35pm , Alvin took the PK bloods , I went to spin it .

Shirley and Anna appeared .

Shirley told me that I spin it at the wrong machine .

Oh no !

Then she asked me to go for the briefing first ....

So I went with Alvin .

Jo , Kan , Alice and Alvin were inside .

Jo went out , leaving me with the rest . We were waiting for the rest when I admited my mistake .

They were asking me what happen next when I told them that I also don't know , since Shirley took over and asked me to go inside first .

Kan continued questioning me ! Is it the left or right centrifuge . I used the left one . How would I know ! True , like Alice said , there should be the protocol and everything beside the machine .... but I DID brought in the time point sheet and checked ! GOSH ! I give up on myself . I can even check wrongly !

Anyway , to cover my backside ..... Nobody told me which centrifuge to use , and yeah .... I did not ask either ....

Alice changed the topic and asked how was Alvin and I coping , any problems . Alvin answered no . I gave the same reply .....

Kan said , " Mu Jie got to be one to one then she will say , right ? "

I looked , nope , STARED at him !!!!

A thousand and one things flashed through my mind . Does he know the consequences of his comment ?! He'll get me into trouble ! And what / how / why .... just what makes him come into such conclusion ?! Okay , come to think of it , he DID asked me if there was anything I wanted to ask him earlier this morning . When I was trying to make myself useful and helpful and followed him into Room 2 and we were walking out .

The comment came as a shock to me and my brain was not working , the only sensible reply I can give at that point was , " Sabo ! "

I totally hate it and felt so lost when people manage to unmask me .

So Alice said , " I will if I have the time . "

Shirley came in , I tried to ask her about the blood , but she signaled me to keep quiet .... I guess everything was alright and under control then ... I hope .

Anyway , so the briefing by Jo ended late . Abby called while I was still rushing back ....

We cursed , " What the hell , " and Hui Ann heard me .

She said it was the first time she heard me curse .

I rushed down to the Purple Line and met Abby . Went to Vivo and found some Japanese Restaurant and sat down .

Percie came and we ordered food .

Talked and talked and talked .

Hui Chueng appeared with Christy .

Yeah !

We were having so much fun and laughter !

This Abby , as usual !

Full of nonsense !!!

All the cannot make it ward stuffs !!!!

Laughed till stomach pain !

" Let go to bed " ?!

Abby left to meet her friend .

Percie left with Christy while I went with Hui Chueng .   

We chatted and I got off at Dover .

Took 185 home and Skyped with him .

Rode to work . Was on the expressway when a police car entered as well . Rode a few more meters and there was another police car . Something was not right . Continued riding and saw accident at the opposite direction . Must be accident , since there were so many bright orange cones around with police cars .

So I reached early and slacked . Anna came . Nothing much . Others slowly appeared .

Worked .

I saw Kan and straight away told him that I can't be on call for Thursday . He was surprised . But it's alright .

It turned out that the subject is staying overnight . There were Me , Hui Ann , Kan , Jo , Anna and Alice . I volunteered to stay till 7pm when the night staffs came , and to appear at 7am the next day to relief the night staffs .

Anna was night on call for tomorrow . So she can't be working at 7am tomorrow .

Jo was DECIDING . She don't want to wake up so early . What made me so mad what that it was not first come first serve basis .

Had some Kopitiam Economical rice for lunch .

It's okay . It's just the beginning , the starting .... I shall see ....

I can see the way you look .

Must be FAIR ?

This is the working world , the sociality .

So , I took the slow public transport home .

Tired .

Went home and slept .

I messaged him about what happened .

He Skyped and made me so mad .

Can't he just really pay attention and spend some time reading what I typed ?! 

Woke up at 7am . Felt refreshed , ready to go to work for the day . Brother left early . Ate Mum's breakfast of carrots , potatoes , meat , tomatoes and hot dog .

Left for work , I was half an hour early . Got my soy bean drink and relaxed a little before starting work . Bernard was around , lucky , got accompany . But he left at 12.30pm . Sad .

He came in during one of the time points . I was so mad that I showed him the piece of paper . They re printed it and HEY !

All the initials are being changed , different already !

Best of all , he spoke exactly what's on my mind !

But never mind , she can cheat and fake for all everybody care . They got EYES to see and they will know it .

I sat inside the lab and waited for the blood to spin ... Don't know .

But it sounds wrong , it's as if IT'S wrong .

Anyway , different people teach differently and I believe what's right and what I feels and think it's right .

I do my job .

Kan got for me my favorite duck rice with egg . He brought Korean for Anna .... But I wanted my duck rice . Had it inside the lounge with Kan , Anna , and Shirley ..... No comments . It just felt so weird . The long awaited craved duck rice became tasteless while I tried to swallow it all up withing record time . I was almost totally mute throughout the meal . The television was showing some news ...

I remembered those Ward 11 / 12 days ... where the television help reduce the awkwardness .

Was busy with all the Onco subjects ... there were a few of them and I was quite lost . But I managed .

Kan left at 3pm . Quite sad as well . Maybe the story will be different , maybe better , maybe not . But I trust that it WOULD be better , if only he stayed .

So it goes ... As usual , I was simply minding my own business when people talk again .

For last month .

Never mind . I got busy with the time points .

I was still not released .

Basic normal rates .

FINE .

Night rates .

WHAT SO EVER .

The worst thing which I cannot even believe it was that the calculator came right under / before my eyes .

COOL !

I found the long lost calculator at Station 2 while I was with Bernard over there .

Subjects slowly left one by one . Mine left as well .... Then I saw , yeah ... Ward practices again ??? Very hard to kick the bad habits , but that's the standard to maintain .

Flask and cup .

I was packing up , expecting Brother to come and fetch me .

When I came out , I saw Mia . She was all ready to do the 7pm time point . Yeah . I admit . Was just acting busy .

But so ?

I asked and she was gone already !

Very fast .

Thanks to Mia and Shar who came early and took over the 7pm time point . I was still preparing / expected to stay to the 7.15pm time .

They hooked up the subject and we were so busy chatting and talking . How I wished that I am on night with them so that we can continue our conversation .

Shar talked to me just before I left .

Brother was held up at his work . Went to Jurong Point Mos Burger . Aim to get the LARGE MILK TEA !!!!

I miss him so much ....

Was waiting and expecting Brother's message when it was still Shar ....

I was speak less ... How to reply ??

Brother came . He had my left overs and we went to POSB to withdraw money . My pay is still not in yet .

Went to May Bank to pay the loan . Went to Popular and get the self laminating pouches as well , $13.09 .

Was walking to NTUC while I shopped , while Brother played Ipad games .

NTUC .... not much money , so we brought a few stuffs only . $20.70 .

Brother drove to petrol station . He pay money while I drove to pump air . But the time he came back , I had already finished pumping the air .

Got him to drove home to park ...

Chatted with him till 12am plus .

And tomorrow still 7am !!!

OFF !

Made some phone calls . Settled . So , I left at around 1pm . Took 502 all the way to Orchard with all my novels and dictionary . Went to I.E.C. . My appointment was at 2pm but I was slightly late . Got the product and headed down to International Plaza . It was raining . Got the Mao Shang Wang Durian Mochi .

They only start making it at 2pm , and closes at 7pm .

Went to Brass Brash . Sold all the novels . $5.00 only . Went Popular as well , but could not find the self  laminating cards . Too bad .

Went down to the National Library . The Book Cross was empty . Sad .

Facial appointment at 4.30pm . Went ....

Thought of popping by Jurong East Library Book Cross ... But did not .

Went home . Gave Mum the Mochi . She cooked vermicelli for me .

Dad and Brother came home . I scolded Brother . We had the Mochi . Finished all 6 of them in 1 day .

So , I managed to dragged myself home after work ...

Zzzz ...

Saw Mum and Dad but did not speak to them . It was 8.30am . I slept all the way till 5.30pm .

Cool .

Woke up , slacked , slept again .

Tomorrow off !

But I don't know what to do for my off day ...

What should I plan ???

I went down . Met Saw , Yap and Jie Ling . Got my Urine FEME form and some PT / PTT forms .

I read finished my Empress Orchid book . YEAH !

Jo was on break , sleeping , I supposed ..... Miss her .

I spied , stalked .... Was totally disappointed .

What is this man ?!

SLUT .

A slut is a slut , forever opening her leg big and wide .

So , I rode home . Reached at around 7.30am . Rest , slacked , Face book , Internet ....

Had my breakfast and slept . I was sleeping soundly when I was being rudely waked up .

F you , Slut . So noisy !

You Fucking Bitch who is just living off other people's money . Please at least have some little tiny winy bit of respect for yourself ??

Went to the toilet and came out . I almost slipped ! Mum just mopped the floor and it was so slippery ! ARGH .

She told me that there were food but I simply ignore her . Go get a life !

So I Face Book , managed to order the Lazy Cat Anti Dust Cap ! Yeah . But out of stocks for the Twins Cat .... Sad .

I so badly wanted to ride . Yeah . Might as well just die on the road . Don't ever shed any crocodile tears for me . You all are liars , fakers . If I were to die , remember , it's all because of you wrong doings , pushing me , forcing me . All because of you .

It rained .....

Are raindrops the tears of angels in heaven ?

Brought my soy drink and went up to Room 4 to have a short nap . Woke up and started working ....

So pissed !!!

I am still so tired . And I don't have my schedule yet !

I want to clock more hours .

Aim for this month - to work daily .

I had off / medical leave when I got injured . This month , this month would be a better month .

And yeah ... it's the last lap !

1 month and 11 days .............. more .